100 Words Per Mile: Marathon Training Begins

Why did I decide to do this?

December 28, 2021
5.04 miles
40:12

I registered for a marathon today. Holy shit. Here we go.

My dad and my stepmother flew into town today, which got me really excited because when I think about the models for my marriage and now my journey as a parent, it’s those two.

My mom and my dad split when I was about six years old. That’s what happens when you meet in November, get pregnant, and marry in September. Honestly, I’m surprised they made it as far as they did.

I was about seven years old, I think, when I met my stepmother for the first time, which means she’s been a part of my life for over twenty-five years. When you consider she and my dad’s relationship in a vacuum (i.e. post-my mom), it’s the closest thing in my life that actually mirrors my current experience.

While my dad was only twenty years old when I was born, he was about to be thirty-one when my sister was born, which is much more comparable to my current situation. My dad and my stepmother only had the one girl, and because my brother and I lived with our mother most of her life, my sister was essentially an only sibling—a future I anticipate for my daughter.

Now that I’m in my thirties, my entire perspective on my parents’ lives is wildly different. Growing up, I would’ve considered my sister and I closer, if only because we were our father’s children. We were subject to his rules and whims. That was our shared experience. But ten years is a large age gap to overcome, and I’m probably closer to my stepmother than I am my sister now, because the shared experience with my sister is gone.

Weirdly, my daughter had her first real fit after my dad and my stepmom visited. I don’t know if she was overstimulated or was experiencing her first bit of gas trouble, but she cried with a ferocity she hadn’t done before. Not even in the moments after her birth.

I’m feeling nervous about the marathon. I only have about six weeks to really prepare, and while I ran the half marathon well, that took quite a bit out of me, and this one is going to be twice as long. The attention and commitment it’s going to require of me is only going to be compounded by the fact that my daughter will only be three months old when I race. It’s going to take me almost four hours—maybe longer, but hopefully not—to complete a marathon. That’s four hours I’ll be away and a large window to leave my wife to fend for herself, especially first-thing in the morning.